Based on the true story of inner city Philadelphia swim coach Jim Ellis. The story revolves around Ellis’ fight to build a swim team in one of Philly’s toughest neighborhoods in the 1970s. Ultimately, Ellis leads the swimmers to the state championships. (“P.D.R.” stands for Philadelphia Dept. of Recreation) – “Pride.”
STARRING: Terrence Howard, Bernie Mac, Tom Arnold, Regine Nehy, Kevin Phillips
DIRECTOR: Sunu Gonera
STUDIO: Lionsgate
RATING: PG (For Mild Language)
The sequel to the 2006 horror re-make, “The Hills Have Eyes,” which grossed over $41 million at the domestic box office, was written by horror legend Wes Craven and Jonathan Craven and was directed by Martin Weisz. The storyline of “The Hills Have Eyes 2″ follows a group of young National Guard trainees who are attacked by mutants during a training mission in the New Mexico desert. We admit, in full disclosure, that we never watched the original. Nor will we be seeing the sequel. Fox Atomic is neither screening it for critics or promotional audiences. Somehow, however, we have a feeling its going to kick ass during its first day in theaters.
STARRING: A BUNCH OF ABSOLUTE NOBODIES – including, Jessica Stroup, Reshad Strik, Michael McMillian, Daniella Alonso, Lee Thompson Young, Ben Crowley, Eric Edelstein, Michael Bailey Smith, David Reynolds, Derek Mears, Tyrell Kemlo, Javier Nieto, Gáspár Szabó, Jeff Kober, Jay Acovone, Archie Kao, Philip Pavel
DIRECTOR: Martin Weisz
STUDIO: Fox Atomic
RATING: R (For alleged grotesquerie that our eyes have never laid upon, tits and ass (of the female persuasion, we assume, only), language worthy of four bars of soap and young adult stars who may never be welcomed home for Thanksgiving or Christmas ever again)
Many Iranian girls love soccer as much as their countrymen and sport fans all over the world but, they are prevented by law from attending live soccer matches in their country. Inspired by the day when his own daughter was refused entry to a soccer stadium in Iran, Jafar Panahi’s “Offside” follows a day in the life of a group of Iranian girls attempting to watch their team’s World Cup qualifying match against Bahrain at the stadium in Tehran.
A disparate group of girls, united only by their desire to see their beloved team play live and in-person, disguise themselves in myriad ways, risking arrest to try to get into the game. The girls are either caught trying to get in or are spotted in the crowd once they make it past the entry guards, and all are taken to a holding area on the upper level of the stadium, where they are tortured by being able to hear the roar of the crowd without being able to see what is happening in the match.
The young women, who range from timid to tomboy, are guarded by a group of naïve young soldiers who would rather be watching the game themselves, out with their girlfriends or at home looking after their sheep.
The soldiers and their prisoners are so close in age, and the girls’ crimes so harmless, that they have a hard time maintaining their adversarial roles.
As they wait out the game, the young men interact with and befriend the generally far more savvy women. One girl is a tomboy from the city who taunts the guards about their country ways. Another young woman relates the adventure that got her caught to cheers from the other girls – she stole an officer’s uniform to disguise herself but, made the mistake of sitting in the wrong chair in the VIP enclosure.
One young soldier, who is as much a fan as his captives, is persuaded into shouting out the highlights of the game as he watches through a gate. When he is scolded by a slightly superior officer, his punishment is being forced to escort one of the girls to the bathroom. Fearful of how the men in the stadium might react, he punches out the eyes of a cardboard player’s poster to make a mask for his prisoner, so she won’t offend any men on the way. One girl turns out not to be a soccer fan at all but, has her own sentimental reasons for wanting to be at the game in honor of a friend.
As the game nears it’s end, the girls are rounded up in a van to be transported to jail, along with another young man who was caught setting off firecrackers in the stadium. The soldier in charge is persuaded to turn on the radio so they can hear the final moments of the game on the way and, when Iran defeats Bahrain to win the qualifying match, the day ends happily for all – “Offside.”
STARRING: Sima Mobarak Shahi, Safar Samandar, Shayesteh Irani, Mohammad Kheyrabadi, Ida Sadeghi
DIRECTOR: Jafar Panahi
STUDIO: Sony Classics
RATING: PG (For language throughout, and some thematic elements)
While lecturing in Brazil, Dr. Taylor Briggs, an authority on memory diseases is asked to consult on a patient found at the headwaters of the Amazon. During the examination, Taylor is accidentally exposed to a mysterious substance which unlocks a series of genetically stored memories inside his brain; memories that are not his, but may be glimpses into the life of a nefarious killer: a killer who has been committing nefarious tasks for over three decades.
STARRING: Billy Zane, Ann-Margret, Dennis Hopper, Tricia Helfer, Terry Chen
DIRECTOR: Bennett Joshua Davlin
STUDIO: Eastgate
RATING: R (For language and frightening images)
A battle of naked ambition played out on the national and, ultimately, world stage, “Air Guitar Nation” chronicles the birth of the US Air Guitar Championships as legions of aspiring rock stars live out their dreams on a quest to become the world champion in a strange world where musical ability plays second fiddle to virtual virtuosity. As the film un-reels, two aspiring rock legends strum and strut their way towards glory and the coveted national title. C. Diddy (David Jung), a samurai warrior clad in a “Hello Kitty” breast plate and red kimono, emerges as an early favorite. But his arch nemesis from the Lower East Side, Björn Türoque (Dan Crane), is not far behind. While C. Diddy threatens to unleash his self-professed “Asian Fury” on his competitors, Björn vows to take Diddy down. As the film reaches its climax, the future of Air hangs in the balance; will Björn’s technical prowess, stage presence, and be enough to take him to the top, or will C. Diddy conquer all to become America’s first supreme being of Air -Guitar – “Air Guitar Nation.”
STARRING: Dan Crane, Gordon Hintz, David S. Jung, Zac Munro
DIRECTOR: Alexandra Lipsitz
STUDIO: Shadow Distribution
RATING: R (For some language and brief nudity)
In the meantime, Laura (KATHERINE HEIGL), a shy, hesitant young woman recently out of a relationship, waits for a blind date arranged by her brother-in-law Sean. Steve (DAZ CRAWFORD) opens the date by bragging about his new pump action shotgun (“It’s great for killing pigeons, the dirty little bastards”) and telling Laura that her brother-in-law is a compulsive masturbator. The loud, abrasive, hyper-masculine Steve must be the worst blind date of all time. The timid Laura finally works up the confidence to bid Steve adieu and retreats to the toilets where she is welcomed by Angela’s retching. The two strangers bond and share war stories from the front lines of the battle between the sexes. Laura suggests that perhaps a commitment from a man who opts to wear women’s underwear is better than no commitment at all.
Returning from the restroom, Mike is horrified to discover his ex-girlfriend has also turned up at the café with a date. In fact, it is Laura with the blind date from hell, Steve; but Mike misreads the body language and mistakenly thinks they are getting along swimmingly. He is even more miserable than before.
As the lunch rush descends on the café, it becomes painfully apparent that the place is falling apart and Rachel needs Charlie to be at work in the kitchen to restore order. Especially because her prospective new employer will arrive any minute. In the café, Lucy’s dementia causes her to mistake the youthful Mike for her long-dead, depraved husband. Meanwhile, Mike has worked up the nerve to introduce himself to the ex-porn queen Gloria. But it’s all for naught, as Lucy attacks Mike, wrestles him into a headlock while screaming “pervert” at the top of her lungs. After a wicked forehand with a rolled newspaper nearly decapitates Mike, Lucy is tossed from the café by Tom and Dylan…upsetting Vanessa who searches the neighborhood in vain for her grandmother.
With Vanessa missing and Dylan scarcely helping, Tom becomes nearly hystrerical amidst the chaos and the mounting numbers of back orders and threatens to quit. Rachel begs him to stay, revealing her secret about the job offer and surprise inspection. Always loyal, Tom relents, only if Charlie is let back in the kitchen. Rachel reluctantly agrees.
Wandering the streets muttering to herself, Lucy spies something interesting in a car. Could it be a pump action shotgun?
In the kitchen, Charlie has asked each member of the café staff about the condom and concluded that Rachel slept with Dylan to avenge his infidelity. Unhinged by visions of Rachel and Dylan drunkenly romancing each other, Charlie, with impeccable timing, storms into the café to express his undying love for Rachel….creating quite the scene just as Mr. Davies (NEIL DICKSON) from The Marion arrives. Rachel is mortified.
Dude (HAL OSZAN), a spaced-out American hippie with guitar in tow, determines this is the perfect moment to serenade them with his ridiculously morbid original song “I Wish I Was Dead.” Mr. Davies, as well as the customers at the Black Cat Café, is appalled. Mike, however, is moved to tears. Returning to their table, Angela gives David and John three ultimatums: she’s wearing the dress at the wedding; they’ll buy David his own set of underwear so hers won’t be stretched out of shape; and if anyone ever finds out about this, she will kill them both. David and Angela leave the bewildered John with the bill.
Deeply moved by Dude’s song, Mike decides to ignore Danny’s advice and try to make up with Laura. However, their conversation is cut short by the powerful blast of a shotgun wielded by – who else? – Lucy, the mumbling old woman who mistook Mike for her philandering husband. She has come to take Mike home to cure him of his “problem”. Everyone ducks for cover as the gun fires a second time into the wall. Dylan, who just learned that the publishers passed on his novel, breaks out of his funk and crashes a plate over Lucy’s head knocking her unconscious. Vanessa rushes in to her aid.
Startled by the sound of the blasts, Rachel excuses herself from her interview with Davies and restores order in the cafe. Charlie, meanwhile, races into the office to calm a confused Mr. Davies, and sings Rachel’s praises, knowing that if she gets the job, she’ll be leaving the café and, quite possibly, him behind. Rachel overhears Charlie’s conversation with Davies and is clearly moved by this selfless behavior.
Mike confides in Danny that the shotgun blast so terrified him that he shat his pants. Literally. Danny is shocked by this declaration, and carefully helps Mike toward the door, where they nearly collide with Laura who has just emerged from the ladies room. Embarrassed at first, Mike realizes this is his chance to connect with Laura and hesitantly asks if maybe he can call her sometime. After suffering the likes of Steve, she is clearly elated by the prospect. Then she asks “What’s that smell?” just as an irate Danny drags Mike out the door.
After Mr. Davies leaves the cafe, Rachel tells Charlie he has offered her the job but she isn’t sure she should accept. Charlie encourages her to take it. They both join the rest of the wait staff in the kitchen, where Rachel announces that she’s decided to take the Marion job. Tom’s eyes well up. He’s clearly emotionally bruised from the chaos of the day. Rachel pulls him aside asking if he’ll replace her as manager of the Black Cat. He tearfully accepts.
Later that afternoon, a calm has replaced the lunch hour chaos at the café and Rachel and Charlie talk about all that has transpired. Rachel, touched by Charlie’s willingness to go out on a limb for her, agrees to think about giving him another chance.
As the day ends, Vanessa is walking her grandmother back to her domicile when Lucy briefly escapes her perpetual daze and says, “Thank you for a lovely afternoon, dear.” “Of course,” says Vanessa, and hugs her sweetly, shielding her from traffic. The usually caustic Vanessa reveals she had been hiding a warm and affectionate side we hadn’t seen until this moment.
In the kitchen, Tom asks Dylan if there’s any truth to the rumor that Rachel and he were involved, but Dylan interrupts, reminding him that the condom was theirs. Tom replies, “I know…but with all the talk I thought there might have been….” He relaxes and apolozizes, finally accepting the fact that everything is going to be okay. “What a day,” says Tom. “I can’t believe I’m going to be the new boss.” Dylan smiles: “Yeah, well, just remember who’s the boss in the bedroom.” It turns out that Tom and Dylan are a healthier, more loving couple than any other we’ve met on this crazy day at the Black Cat Cafe.
STARRING: Mena Suvari, Breckin Meyer, Marsha Thomason, Katherine Heigl, Mike Vogel
DIRECTOR: John Cosgrove
STUDIO: Meurer Productions
RATING: NOT RATED (But Language, Nudity, Sexual Situations abound)
God, Greed, and the American Dream. A tiny town in New Mexico is turned upside down when the face of Jesus Christ appears upon a tortilla.
Welcome to Falfúrrias, New Mexico…population 73. A tightly-knit community revolving around church, family, and fresh Mexican food – and not necessarily in that order.
Across the plaza from the church is the town’s only restaurant, called Tortilla Heaven. It’s owner and proprietor, Isidor Navarro, makes the very best food in all of New Mexico. But no one knows about it – except for the 72 other people who live in the town. Why? Because Falfúrrias is 3 miles from the highway, and the only thing linking them to the rest of humanity is, as they call it, a pinche dirt road. Which isn’t a good thing.
One Sunday, while the rest of town piously prays the Lord’s Mass, Isidor makes tortillas for the lunchtime crowd. But today he’s having trouble with the dough. He rolls it, slaps it, slams it; yet time and again one tortilla comes out wrong. “Jesus pinche Christ!” he curses, tossing it onto the comal (grill). What he doesn’t notice is that the tortilla begins to burn – in a very special way. And on it appears the face of the just maligned Jesus Christ.
It is undoubtedly a miracle. In the most unlikely of places.
Of course you can’t keep a miracle secret. By next day the whole town crowds into Isidor’s restaurant. And no one’s there to eat. “Show us the miracle!,” “We want to see the Tortilla with the face of Jesus Christ!” Suddenly, Isidor has a revelation: he can make a fortune! He charges them 3 bucks a head; $1 for the Father, $2 for the Son, $3 for the Holy Spirit. And although no-one is rich in Falfúrrias, everyone happily pulls out the green.
Word spreads like wildfire. The pilgrims come from all around the State. To worship. To gawk. To leave heart-felt prayers tacked to the walls of the Tortilla’s newly-built shrine. There’s a counting of the miracles; all the unexplainable and wondrous events occasioned by the Tortilla’s appearance: including a child who can suddenly walk; a suddenly profitable business for Isidor, and, most convincingly, the resuscitation of a pig.
Among the hordes comes a city-slicker named Gil Garcia. Suspiciously out of place in a bright red, souped-up, low-rider pick-up, with three Chicana babes always in tow. Billing himself as a management consultant, agent, and attorney-at-law, Gil introduces Isidor to the ideas of expansion and franchising…even Tortilla Heaven merchandising. All Isidor has to do is “sign on the dotted line”….and all his dreams for himself and his family will come true. Of course, Isidor signs Gil on his partner.
As the bucks begin to roll in, everyone in town tries to claim the Tortilla for themselves. The mayor insists the Tortilla belongs to the city, with all admission fees to go towards building a municipal golf course. The priest knows better: “Jesus Christ is the registered trademark of the Roman Catholic Church!, ” he insists. Soon there are souvenirs, memorabilia, and the Mug of the Holy Mug (“Have Jesus with your coffee – as He appeared to us!!”). Under Gil’s guidance, Isidor eventually takes in everyone in Falfúrrias as his business partners, and for a while everyone can live off the Tortilla…and does.
But of course Gil is really the master of the scam. Manipulating the contractual fine print and preying upon ignorance and greed, Gil soon pits family against family, friends against friends, husband against wife. Rather than basking in riches and glory, Falfúrrias is being pulled deeper and deeper in debt. Suddenly the whole town is fighting. No one is speaking to anyone, no one is sleeping with anyone, and Tortilla Heaven becomes Tortilla Hell. Even Isidor’s wife and young son want nothing to do with him.
At the brink of financial disaster and facing the estrangement of his family, Idisor resolves to restore normalcy. But is he too late? And who in Hell is this Gil?
And that’s when the REAL miracle occurs – “Tortilla Heaven.”
STARRING: José Zúñiga, George Lopez, Miguel Sandoval, Lupe Ontiveros
DIRECTOR: Judy Hecht Dumontet
STUDIO: Archangel Entertainment
RATING: PG-13 (For some nudity and sexual humor)
Linda Hanson (Sandra Bullock) has a beautiful house, a loving husband and two adorable daughters. Her life is perfect, until the day she receives the devastating news that her husband Jim (Julian McMahon) has died in a car accident. When she wakes up the next morning to find him alive and well, she assumes it was all a dream, but is shaken by how vivid it felt. She soon realizes it wasn’t a dream, and her world is turned upside down as the surreal circumstances lead her to discover that her perfect life may not have been all that it appeared. Desperate to save her family, Linda begins a furious race against time and fate to try and preserve everything that she and Jim have built together – “Premonition”
STARRING: Sandra Bullock, Julian McMahon, Jeff Galpin, Nia Long, Amber Valletta, Marcus Lyle Brown, Mark Famiglietti
DIRECTOR: Mennan Yapo
STUDIO: Tri-Star Pictures
RATING: PG-13 (For some violent content, disturbing images, thematic material and brief language)
I Think I Love My Wife,” written, directed by and starring Chris Rock, is a sophisticated comedy about marriage and the lure of a new love. Nikki (Kerry Washington) is the exciting free spirit who makes Richard’s (Chris Rock) daydreams come true while Richard’s wife Brenda (Gina Torres) is so preoccupied with her own career and raising their two children that she has little time for her husband.
STARRING: Chris Rock, Kerry Washington, Gina Torres, Steve Buscemi
DIRECTOR: Chris Rock
STUDIO: Fox Searchlight
RATING: R (For pervasive language and some sexual content)
Newlyweds Jamie and Lisa Ashen have established a new life for themselves far from their hometown of Ravens Fair-a sleepy, near-forgotten blip on the map haunted by late-night whispers and ghost stories from generations past. But when his wife is gruesomely murdered, Jamie reluctantly returns to Ravens Fair for the funeral, intent on unraveling the mystery surrounding her death.
Once back under his family’s roof, reunited with his ill father and his father’s new young bride, Jamie begins to explore the creepy town and encounters the legend of Mary Shaw, a famous murdered ventriloquist whose presence still casts a pall over Ravens Fair. Himself the lead suspect in his wife’s murder, Jamie is forced to dig deep into the town’s bloody past for answers, where he soon uncovers the truth behind the curse that ended Lisa’s life and threatens to take his as well – “Dead Silence.”
STARRING: Ryan Kwanten, Amber Valletta, Donnie Wahlberg, Bob Gunton
DIRECTOR: James Wan
STUDIO: Universal Pictures
RATING: R (For horror violence and images and vile language)
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